Missing the Bus

We live in a culture that is ridiculously busy. We often talk about how much overtime we

have or how hard we work with pride in our voice and smugness in our demeanor. With this, we pass this “work ethic” onto our children and ultimately teach them to do as much as possible. Some pass this off as teaching their children a good “work ethic” when in truth, I fear that we are teaching our children that success is characterized by how busy a person can become.

 Education is a priority and eating your vegetables is a priority. Providing for your family is a priority. We teach our kids that team practices and games are a priority so as to teach them dedication. Where does God fit in all of this? I do not mention all of this in order to demonize sports or jobs, but to glorify the use of moderation and priority.

 In youth group, we have been talking about Authentic Faith: If you believe that God really is the Son of God and really died on the cross for your sins which separate you from Him, how could you NOT have an evident change in your life and be telling everyone you know this news? Many of our students had their eyes opened and began to question what their life reflected. This also sparked questions of my own faith and the curiosity of how adult congregants would react given this question.

The famed magician and professed atheist Penn Jilette has questioned the authenticity of the Christian faith by stating, “If you believe there is a heaven and hell, and you think it’s not worth telling someone about it, how much do you have to hate him to not proselytize (evangelize)? To believe that everlasting life is possible and not tell people? If you knew someone was going to get hit by a bus, would you not do everything you could to push them out of the way?” Amen Penn. This quote hit me like a ton of bricks. Especially as a parent. I love my kids more than life itself. I want them to succeed and I want to keep them safe. I want them to have a relationship with God, give their whole heart to God, and to grow up to teach their families the same. Where I falter is in wondering if I am giving my whole heart in showing them authentic faith. Am I placing priority on their spiritual health?

In all of the busyness, are we fitting God into the core values of our families or have we become so busy teaching our children to be busy? If I saw a bus headed in Noah or Elliot’s direction I would not simply yell out, “Hey, you might want to watch out for that bus.” I would lay my life down for my sons. I would do everything possible to get them to safety.

For my boys, I want to teach them to take the time to rest; that family devotional time is a priority. I want to instill that the time we take together to unplug and thank God for the blessings He has given is the most important part of our day. When Noah, my 12 year old, wakes in the morning for school, he does not have an option to not go to school unless he is sick. When he is sick, I take him to the doctor because I love him and want him healthy. When it is Sunday morning and it is time for church and Sunday night and time for youth group, Noah does not have the option to not go, nor will he or Elliot ever have this option, because I love them and I want people to sow into their life and teach them their wisdom when it comes to doing life with God as the lead.

 Though many may struggle to hear this message, call me a “helicopter parent,” it is one that I find so important to address for the sake of all parents. Are we truly instilling in our children that we believe in God the way that we say we do? That we believe God is the most important part of their life and for that, we would lay our life down to show them this kind of faith?

Scripture: 1 Kings 19:11-13

Why I'm Still Eating Oreos and Chick-Fil-A

A few weeks back, Oreo came out with a graphic of an Oreowith rainbow colored layers, representing that they supported gay marriage.Recently, Chick-Fil-A owner Dan Cathy has been in hot water for publiclyaddressing that his company supports the “biblical marriage unit” i.e. man andwoman. So as expected, many leftists began boycotting Oreo and many rightwingers vowed to never eat Chick-Fil-A again. Where do I stand? I’m off in thecorner, boycotting the boycots, and eating all the Oreos and Chicken sandwiches.

Believer or non-believer, most of you reading this blog livein the United States.

While the U.S.has it’s problems, there is a beauty in the amount of freedom that we have beenblessed with. We are free to speak our mind, to hold beliefs, or to not believein anything if we so choose. Freedom is a fantastic benefit of being anAmerican. What baffles me and irritates me to the core is that we can claim tobe a country that fights for our freedom of speech, freedom to hold certainvalues, and freedom to believe whatever we want, yet we often will attackwhoever doesn’t believe the way in which we want them to.

When Oreo came out with their rainbow graphic, some in theChristian world decided that it was not o.k. for this company to voice theirbeliefs, resulting in a lot of hateful statements and the boycotting ofOreo/Nabisco. I, however, did not see any problem with this statement. Theywere standing for what they believed and just stating what they value. They didnot come out and say that they were against “straight marriage” or that theywould no longer hire straight people at their company. Nor did they say thatthey would no longer be making Oreos for straight people (which would have beendevastating as Oreos are DELICIOUS).

When Dan Cathy stated this week that his company supportsthe “biblical representation of marriage,” the internet blew up with talk ofboycotts and the disgust of Cathy’s “hate and discrimination.” I made sure toread all of Dan Cathy’s interview and am not sure where he is beingdiscriminatory or hateful. His company, like Oreo/Nabisco, holds a value to betrue for them. At no time did they state that they would not serve, hire, oraccept homosexual people in their restaurants. In fact, Chick-Fil-A states, “The Chick-Fil-A culture and service tradition in our restaurants is to treatevery person with honor, dignity, and respect—regardless of their belief, race,creed, sexual orientation or gender.” That sounds like a tradition anyone couldbe a part of and one that I personally can support. A policy of loving everyoneand treating them with the respect and dignity that everyone, Christian or not,deserves.

So we can condemn Oreo for making a bold statement and wecould condemn Dan Cathy for holding a value that is not popular. Or we can beblessed to live in a country where we can embrace our differences, be free tobelieve what we want, and still love the other side in the process. If lovingyour neighbor even though they don’t agree with you is not something you can geton board with, well, more Oreos and Chick-Fil-A for me.

If you are interested in more info on Oreo of Chick-Fil-A join the conversation on Facebook:

Facebook.com/chickfila
Facebook.com/chickfila
Facebook.com/Oreo

Fifty Shades of Magic Mike

If you haven’t been living under a rock for the past six months, you have certainly had a conversation or heard a conversation or seen a facebook post concerning the Magic Mike/Fifty Shades of Grey fanaticism. What you may not have seen or heard is a post or conversation that is not ignoring the reality of this phenomenon.  Though I am positive I am going to take a lot of heat for this blog, I…. well, I will take one for the team. I am not sure which team this is as we have so far been a small and silent group. So here goes.

AM I THE ONLY ONE IGNORING THE FACT THAT FIFTY SHADES OF GREY IS GIRL PORN? I won’t apologize for yelling. That deserved some caps. I haven’t been able to go a day lately without hearing or seeing reference about Christian Grey, but in none of that have I seen a realistic comment about the nature of this literature. I am not talking about this from a minister’s perspective necessarily, (Though I am shocked at the number of Christian women on this bandwagon) but from the lense of someone who is in a happy and committed relationship.

I will be the first to admit that when I was single, I referred to Channing Tatum as Channing “Imsofreakinghott” Tatum and as a show of God’s good works. ( I was young and hilarious and single and let’s face it, he is attractive). While this may be a good point, how would you ladies react if you husband or boyfriend got tickets in advance, went on and on about, and planned to go see on opening night a movie about strippers? Maybe you’re cool with that. To each her own. I however would feel a little angry but more hurt emotionally and in my confidence.

If your husband or boyfriend came home with a book the equivalent of Fifty Shades of Grey, read it, commented about it on facebook, talked about it, would you be ok with that? I would be again hurt and disgusted. There would be a lot of emotional issues going on in relationships if the coin was flipped.

So I ask you, if you are someone who has read or thought about reading this book, is it worth it? Is your significant other being truthful about how they feel about it? Have you thought about how it might make them feel even if they would never tell you? (I am shocked about how many parents are unknowingly letting their teens read this “Best Selling novel” and how many teenagers I know personally who are currently reading this series).

I surveyed a few men in committed relationships for this blog, and each one commented that they would feel like junk and a few who do feel inadequate because their girlfriend or wife has joined this craze. But the catch is few have talked to their significant other about it because they don’t want to seem “like a girl” or childish about caring.

I wrote a blog a few months back about the problem with porn in marriages. It seems that Fifty Shades has crept in, a pornographic work, disguised as a novel, and for that it is socially acceptable. For me, in my opinion, there is a lot of damage that this could do to relationships in the same way that internet porn has ruined many lives.

My challenge and point? Think twice before doing what everyone else is doing just because society says it is ok to take part. Think about your man or your future man. Everything is permissible but not all things are beneficial.

Ignorance is in the Eye of the Beholder

I am ultra frustrated today. I feel like I can't even concentrate on life. I don't know why I even log on Facebook. I love staying in touch with college friends, love that our lives can be connected. What I hate is that every other post lately is politically motivated or another post calling me ignorant because I believe in God. Let me unpack this for you so you understand and so I bury my urge to throw my computer off a balcony.

This is not a post about what I think about gay marriage. I will say that I think divorce is ruining the sanctity of marriage and maybe we should put a little attention on how we accept that as a church, but I digress. This is not about my opinion. But it is about the fact that I am entitled to one. As an American, as a human being, and even as a Christian, I am entitled to opinion. I am entitled to belief. Just as all who are a different religion or hold no spiritual belief at all, are entitled to an opinion. It is a beautiful thing. But I find myself being labeled ignorant by others and "judgemental" for holding any beliefs unless it is the one that is popular. What is ignorant is posting Bible verses from the old testament out of context to attack Christianity. (Jesus came to fulfill the law. So you are right, I'm not going to hell for eating shellfish or wearing two types of material. Thank you for educating me). What is judgemental is telling me I cannot have an opinion or a belief because it is not yours. What is ignorant is Christians posting hate fueled comments and using the Bible to  try and excuse it. What is judgemental is attacking others for holding a view you think is wrong. Whats ridiculous is taking scripture and using it to make it say what you want to say and not what it was meant for because you wish it was the popular view.

What is absolutely IGNORANT,IMMATURE, RIDICULOUS, is using Facebook to be a coward and tell anyone that they are not allowed to believe anything that you don't want them to. We were all made with the inherent desire to believe something. SO you have your belief, I will have mine. We can love one another, give to Caesar what is Caesar's and you and I can have an adult conversation in person if you are concerned that my belief is not correct.

Deep Breaths

Today is one of those days where my prayer to God is, "Please just give me something. A sign. A piece of good news. Something." We all have those days now and again. There is not a whole lot really extremely dramatic going on, but sometimes the worst of times seem to be when there are a lot of little things going on that by themselves seem to be insignificant, but together can tear a person down. This would be the perfect time for a vacation. But who has the time or the money? Certainly not with all of these things weighing down on me currently.


A vacation would be running from my problems, I know, but sometimes it seems like the most enticing option. Is running from our problems really all that wrong? I know never dealing with something is not productive, but what about just getting away from them for a while? I don't see the harm in that. Sometimes it takes stepping back from a problem for a while in order to really have the right perspective to see its solution.


I wonder the value in being taught to face our problems head on and tackle them as soon as they arise. Is this what God intended? The mental health market in the U.S.is absolutely insane (pun intended) right now, largely due with people needing an immediate fix to their problems.(Not saying there is not value in psychiatric help of those who need it). We are taught to deal with it and deal with it now. This verse highlights a little of what I mean:


"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Matthew 11:28-30 NIV
Is essence, is Christ not telling us to rely on him and that he wants to give us rest? I am well aware that we have to do our part in mending the problems in our lives, but I also believe there is value in rest. The Bible goes on and on about rest and how it has tremendous value in our lives. Maybe sometimes we just need to let problems be and stop trying to fix everything on our own.


"So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
Matthew 6:34


So for the problems I have going on right now, I am taking a moment. Taking time to find out the direction in which God wants to lead me in these areas. Relying on God because that should be the first action taken in any problem. Because today has problems, tomorrow will have problems. People will be human and ruin your day. So take a breath, rest in God, and gain a new perspective. And if anyone wants to take me on vacation to somewhere tropical, my bags are packed. ;)

Self-Destructive Generation

This blog is kind of heavy, but I don't claim to have all the answers and figure I can share with you all what's heavy on my heart currently. 

I am struggling.  Struggling in the battle against my want to be accepting and my desire for what is right. Struggling to decide what to choose in the choice between letting things out of my control just “be” or refusing to accept reality. God has called me to love and I try to do that without restraint, but love is not always that easy when it comes to loving in situations of endemic selfishness and injustice.

It seems that the older I get, the more I become aware and overwhelmed by the injustice and apathy occurring around me, so much so that it makes me sick to think about. I am not sure if this realization is a product of wisdom or more one of the growing disease of selfishness that is plaguing the current 20-30 something generation. Myself being in this generation, do not intend to discredit all, but cannot help but be saddened by the overwhelming amount of those in my own generation who just don’t care about anyone but themselves.

Have you ever just wondered why some people just “don’t get it”? I am sure many have thought that same thought about me before in certain situations, but my point is this; The solution, the stepping stone, the opportunity to do the right thing will be right in front of a person and they simply can’t see it. Or maybe it’s not that they can’t see it. Maybe this is a generation of people who can’t or even won’t fight for what’s right. Won’t work for things that are hard to obtain or simply things that require work.

For many, giving up has been too much of an option in the lives of a generation raised with out “too much pressure.” The American Dream and every man for himself pounded into our minds and hearts. We have options like no generation has ever had. 15 different kinds of bread, 30 different cereals, thousands of different cars, millions of hair styles, millions of careers. In a generation of unlimited options, many have become incapable of satisfaction. Incapable of not wanting the “next best thing.” Ruining their careers, their lives, their families to seek what is the next best thing for them without paying attention to the destruction of those they have left behind. Inevitably ruining their own life and spending the rest of it trying to figure out what went wrong. But unfortunately, many will never realize that they were their own worst enemy. In our world of endless options, they only ever knew how to choose themselves.

Now all we can do is try to find our way back to the righteousness, fullness, and servant’s heart God planned for us and break the cycle of self-destruction. And figure out how. 

How to Be Christ-like to Someone Who Needs a Punch in the Face

Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry… easier said than done right? I’ve really been struggling with this idea lately, especially when daily dealing with people with a seeming propensity to make really unfortunate decisions. I often find myself shaking my head and letting it be so as not to offend because I am Christian and “accepting”; taught not to judge and to love everyone. While I often find myself going this route, I also often find myself wondering if this is the “Christian” thing to do at all.  Have we as Christians become so wrapped up in being “loving” and “accepting” that we fail to speak truth? When did we become scared of the truth? Maybe around the same time that we became scared of not receiving acceptance. Its this cycle of acceptance that gets us. We accept everything so that we can be accepted by everyone.

It is not my intention to say that acceptance is futile. Accepting people as they are and loving them as Christ wants us to should be the basis of all of our relationships. But as we grow in relationship, what if we see a friend or family member going down a path or making decisions that will ultimately devastate? Do we sit back and let them “live their life” and stay out of it for fear that they might get mad? Or that we would be seen as unaccommodating or judgmental? Maybe we don’t go the route of a “punch in the face” as this blog title suggests, but what about admonishing a friend with a swift “slap in the face” of truth? Maybe a “hey man, do you really think this is what you should be doing?” or a “You really need to look at what you are doing here.” When I think of my closest friends, these have been the ones who have guided me and told me when I was wrong, even when it hurt; even when I unfortunately may not have listened or gotten upset; when I finally hit rock bottom, I remembered who I should have listened to.

Colossians 3:16

New International Version (NIV)

16 Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts.

May we learn the difference between admonishment and judgment and seek to guide our loved ones through the help of Christ and his message.